• Blog
  • About
  • Digital Portfolio
  • Presentations
    • Ontario Summit 2019
    • Petaluma iOS Summit >
      • You Can Explain Everything and Your Students Can, Too!
      • Getting Going with Google Classroom
      • Capturing Student Ideas with Visual Apps
    • ISTE15 >
      • Connecting the Next Digital Leaders
      • Hacking the Daily 5
      • Passion-Based Learning: Genius Hour, 20% Time, and Innovation Day
    • DENapalooza Vancouver 2015
    • PITA15 Whistler >
      • Passion-Based Learning: Genius Hour & 20% Time
      • Screencasting for Visible Thinking & Learning
    • CUE15 >
      • Hacking the Daily 5 - Rockstar Jam Session
      • Digital Citizenship for the 21st-Century Citizen
    • Odyssey15
    • iOS Summit Vancouver 2015
    • 2014 Presentations >
      • ERAC IL4K12
      • CUEBC14 >
        • Learn How To Drive: Storage & Collaboration in the Cloud
        • SAMR: A Technology Integration Model for Educators
      • SFU14
      • Union SD Tech Innovation Summit
      • CUE Rockstar Manhattan Beach 2014 >
        • Learn How To Drive
        • Screencasting for Visible Thinking and Learning
        • Hacking the Daily 5
      • CA GAFESummit 2014 >
        • Learn How To Drive
        • SAMR: A Technology Integration Model for Educators
        • Passion-Based Learning
      • JET14
      • MERITCon14
      • ISTE 2014
      • CanFlip14 >
        • Screencasting for Visible Thinking & Learning
        • Passion-Based Learning
      • Vancouver GAFESummit 2014 >
        • Learn How to Drive
        • Passion-Based Learning
      • Walnut Grove - Genius Hour in Elementary
      • Odyssey 2014 >
        • SAMR: A Technology Integration Model for Educators
        • Explain Everything! Practical Uses and How-Tos for Screencasting on Your iPad
        • So You Want to Mystery Skype?
      • Roseville GAFESummit - Passion-Based Learning
  • Contact
A Tech Teacher on a Mission

Maintaining a Long-Distance Relationship: Communication, SEL, and Community

4/24/2020

8 Comments

 
Picture
From 2013-2015, I was in a long-distance relationship with my now-husband. He lived in California and I in British Columbia. Thankfully, we were in the same time zone so we didn't have that hurdle to face, but we still had close to 1000 miles between us.

During that time, we were forced to become masters of communication. Despite having nightly video calls, we couldn't always fully anticipate the emotional affect of the other person. Body language was there, but sometimes obscured. If we were texting, we were missing tone of voice. If we found ourselves in a sticky conversation on any forum, we needed to work it through without the ability to truly look into each others' eyes. 

This wasn't an easy skill to develop. It took a lot of critical self-reflection, humility, and empathy to build those communication skills. Today, I would venture to say that we've relaxed our practice of some of them because we take for granted the proximity we have to one another now. We're not relying on the meticulous communication as much as we used to... because we don't have to anymore.

But now, we've been forced into the cultivation of similar communication skills as we continue (or begin, in some cases!) our teacher-student relationships from a distance. For students and teachers alike, this shift has been abrupt and challenging. From grieving the separation from their friends and school communities to the activities that go on within them, it hasn't exactly been a walk in the park... for anyone. But now we have an opportunity: we can help to build these communication skills in students and in ourselves. 

In normal times, my goal as a Grade 7 teacher is to make my students as independent as humanly possible before they leave my classroom. I teach them how to self-regulate, manage their tasks and their time, to read criteria and texts closely, and to ask critical questions. Essentially, my goal is to teach them how to learn and how to adult simultaneously. Except... they're 12 and 13 years old, so it's rocky and wonderful and imperfect and awkward... all rolled into one. That doesn't mean it's impossible to learn great communication skills, though.

It's important to acknowledge that it's weird for students to suddenly be communicating with their teachers through a screen all the time. Their screens are typically a major part of their world that us teachers are simply not included in (at least in a major way). Also, this shift isn't something that any of us chose - not teachers, not students, and not parents. This hurdle is massive and it might shift the way this communication occurs because most students don't know how to communicate with their teachers through a screen all the time.

So how do we cultivate these independent skills from a distance? How do we ensure that students are getting the message we're trying to send to support their growth as a human? 

First, we need to cultivate that social emotional wellness through building on the trust that already existed in the classroom space. If we always and only come at our students with "this isn't done" or "you didn't do that right," we're not considering the "why" behind those missteps and nurturing them as a person in those exchanges. Positive relational communication starts with checking their emotional affect - "how have you been doing lately?" Hold space for their answer and if all they say is "good," ask for more. They're learning to more effectively communicate and so, as any good teacher might, we need to ask critical questions to get them to elaborate. Once you've satisfied that they're okay and their situation is stable, then move into the issue of why something isn't meeting an academic standard - "Is there anything I can to do help you with your learning?" or "I noticed _____. How can I help you with this?" If they're not okay, omit assignments completely. Give extensions. (Now is not the time for the deadlines life lesson. Seriously.)

Another way to build up this social-emotional wellness is to provide regular communal check-ins as a class. This could be done through synchronous video calls but a universal time to meet may be challenging for many students in the current environment. To address the need for asynchronous community-building options, my Grade 7 colleague and I are doing daily community engagement tasks that require some element of student creativity to complete (you can find my entire post on this here). Some recent examples have been the Cintascotch drawing challenge, building blanket forts to work in for the day, and the Getty Art challenge (images added below have media release).

​The key with any communal task is that students share their work to a space that is accessible to be viewed and commented on by other students. This is critical: they need a space where they can be social about their learning. In getting feedback from my students, they have by and large said that the engagement tasks are one of the best parts of their day. They love seeing what their classmates are creating and don't hesitate to have fun exchanges with one another about their work. 

When it comes to academic communication, it all starts with modelling and creating clear expectations. At the level I teach at, that means I need to carefully craft assignments and it means that students need to read instructions or watch a video carefully, and maybe more than once. I'll say here that the "carefully" and the "more than once" aspects need to be reinforced quite frequently. At lower levels, it might mean that you're creating shorter videos, texts, or soundbites that are easily digestible for parents and students alike, with a bit of advice on student feedback for families.

Ideally, once you get rolling, you would provide frequent opportunities for them to communicate back to you through writing, photography, videos, or their art. Challenge yourself to see what they can create as these are richer learning experiences that rote responses to content questioning. If you can get them on a call, have them reflect on the process: what went well, what was a struggle (if there was one), and how is this different than what we would experience in a normal classroom. Consider formative assessment for students, providing them with a "next step" in their learning process as opposed to a summative performance against a specific outcome.

Last, ask yourself: how can you make communicating with students a somewhat predictable cycle? It's good for them to have an understanding of when and how you are checking in on them. This is the part I'm now working on so students have an established understanding of how they may communicate issues they're having. It's important that this is offered in a way that feels safe and that maintains the tone and positivity of in-person relationships as much as possible.

​Communication is hard. But in the end, it's up to us as adults to make sure that our students feel those emotions of care, love, and belonging... even through a screen. We have to teach them how by learning how to do it ourselves.
Picture
8 Comments
call center outsourcing services link
5/29/2020 04:32:25 am

Businesses invest in call center services for various reasons. While some want to disseminate information, others want to gather data and still others want satisfying and fulfilling interactions with customers.

Reply
Bhuvi Kumar link
3/1/2021 01:38:35 am

The thing that reflects your personality is communication and hence even in the organization the employees and managers must be trained so that they know how to put forth their views and increase productivity.

Reply
Sullivan merry
2/18/2022 02:54:27 pm

When she/he is pointing out every tiny imperfection in the relationship, she/he might be looking for grounds to break up to be with someone else, It could be because she/he doesn't want romantic messages from another to get discovered. Any sort of sneaky behavior like this is a sign, It is not so typical of me to refer to professionals online but I feel like I owe a lot to my hacksecrete@gmail.com who helped me track my cheating husband when he was having an affair, I got to find out that he has been lying to me for the past 5 months and seeing two other women. I was able to get direct access to his text messages, phone conversations and all social networks on his phone remotely : what was most amazing was that his recently deleted messages were retrieved by him. If you are getting less than you deserve in your relationship and want to be sure , there is no crime in that you can also call or text +1 (617) 402-2260 . tell him i referred you

Reply
Jessica Peterson
3/7/2022 11:08:50 am

Best hacker to ever work with is available every time for help i doubted at first but now they proved me wrong with excellent work they did, cyberlord582@gmail.com is my helper for giving me remote access to my husband android phone thanks so much..
call or text +1 (518) 468-2985

Reply
Nicole Morris
6/24/2022 02:52:54 pm

I ordered a job spell on a Friday night and on Monday the place I applied for a job called for me to come by their office. They gave me the job I applied for and made me an offer of more per hour than I have ever made in my life! I am so happy! Government jobs sometimes are a slow process. You somehow managed to speed up that process, and I start in just a few days! DR EMU I will be forever grateful thanks once again. You can call on him for help on his email address emutemple@gmail.com or add him up on his WhatsApp +2347012841542. DR EMU also lent a helping hand to the following } 1. GETTING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. 2. WINNING LOTTERIES. 3. CHILD BEARING. 4. BREAKING OF GENERATION COURSE. 5. GETTING OF JOB. 6. JOB PROMOTION. 7. HERBAL CARE. 8. SPIRITUAL PROTECTION. 9. HERBAL CARE. 10. SPIRITUAL PRAYER. E.T.C.

Reply
Grisha Motivation link
6/29/2022 06:11:59 am

In today's changing environment, it has become even more important build strong and focused communication skills in students / work environment and in ourselves. Thanks for the article.

Reply
Sarah link
9/23/2022 09:42:23 pm


My Husband was so smooth at hiding his infidelity so I had no proof for months, I was referred to some Private investigator and decided to give him a try.. the result was incredible because all my cheating husband's text messages, whatsapp, facebook and even phone conversations was wired directly to my cellphone. if your husband is an expert at hiding his cheating adventures contact him, he's fast whatsapp him on +1 (928) 534 9618 tell him i referred you. Also his website is https://wzardgarryspeedhac.wixsite.com/my-site-1

Reply
Sandra Wike link
11/3/2022 07:55:40 pm


My Husband was so smooth at hiding his infidelity so I had no proof for months, I was referred to some Private investigator and decided to give him a try.. the result was incredible because all my cheating husband's text messages, whatsapp, facebook and even phone conversations was wired directly to my cellphone. if your husband is an expert at hiding his cheating adventures contact him, he's fast and relaible whatsapp him on +1 (928) 534 9618 or email him at wzardgarryspeedhack@gmail.com tell him i referred you. Also his website is https://wzardgarryspeedhac.wixsite.com/my-site-1

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Victoria Olson
    A curious and passionate educator in Langley, BC

    Picture

    Picture

    Picture

    Picture

    Picture

    Picture

    Tweets by @MsVictoriaOlson

    Picture

    Picture

    RSS Feed


    Archives

    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2016
    January 2016
    August 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    July 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013


    Categories

    All
    Assessment
    Augmented Reality
    Balance
    Blogging
    Camtasia
    Collaboration
    Communication
    Community
    Creativity
    Design
    Edcamp
    #EdFailFwd
    Education
    Efficiency
    Elementary
    Google Teacher Academy
    Guided Math
    Intermediate
    Ipads
    Multi Age
    Multi-age
    Pln
    Primary
    Pro D
    Pro D
    Pro-D
    Reflection
    Resource
    Screencasting
    Self Regulation
    Sharing
    Tech
    Things That Suck
    Think35
    Twitter
    Video
    #YourEduStory


    Want to subscribe to this blog? Enter your email address below for automatic email updates:

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.